Sunday Ballet & Since

Sunday's ballet was good. Baby did a great job. Daddy had a guy fill in for him until he could get there. I'm so grateful!

No grandparents or aunt/uncle showed up. How difficult is it to take one Sunday out of your year to show up? Makes me mad.

Anyway.

Sunday's show was Snow White and Rose Red.

Here's Snow White dancing with Prince Charming.

And where was Baby?

In the wings of the stage.

We were sitting far right, so we could see her, but she really wasn't visible to the other people.

Waiting for her turn.

Baby introducing to Snow White

Baby - half a step behind, but she was beautiful!

Cute Rabbit!

Those ears were tricky.

Exiting the stage

Acknowledged at the end of the show

First year award

Saying good-bye to Daddy

Baby and Little Boy - she loved her flowers!

Night at the Ballet

Little Boy before the show


Pixies guarding Baby Aurora


Malificent and the Good Fairies


Pixies exiting


Aurora & Prince Phillip

Dancing at the Wedding

Little Mermaid

Seahorses

Seahorses in the Finale

My Little Seahorse

Little Boy and Baby

Seahorses after the show

Glad to be Home!

My daughter is a monster

Remember that beautiful picture I posted a couple days ago? Everyone says, "Ohhhh, she's so bee-yooooou-ti-ful!"

YEAH, RIGHT.

Tonight, despite warnings that my tiny sewing scissors are sharp enough to cut her little fingers off (slight exaggeration?) I found her in bed with them. She had cut up a tiny American flag. And the top sheet on her bed. From my very expensive sheet set that was a wedding gift. And when I told her she was very naughty, she smiled.

Argh!

I've started

I've started sewing pillowcase dresses! I think it's going to be fun, except for the math. Ugh. I am capable, but for whatever reason, I dislike measurements. Inches really aren't that bad. When it comes to measurement conversion in the kitchen, my brain goes blank. Four years of teaching measurements to elementary age kids, chanting the charts on a daily basis, and I really can't remember any of it under pressure.

On a completely different note, I had another dream about my dad last night. He and my mom were arguing. I walked in and yelled at both of them for yelling in front of the kids. I don't know what kids, and if it was my siblings, I don't know why they were little and I was my current age. But then my dad asked me to give him a ride somewhere. In the car, he asked me when I got so smart. I didn't know, but I told him that at some point along the way, I've realized that my opinion is valid; that I have valid observations.

I didn't want to wake up. It was so good to see his face, and hear his voice. And the fact that neither parent killed me for speaking up was a good thing, too.

We got haircuts today. Baby's bangs aren't great, but I'll wait until we wash her hair to have a final opinion. Little Boy and I decided he should go a tiny bit shorter than usual. His head gets so hot and sweaty in the summer. Especially when he runs around outside wearing an army helmet!

My husband went back to work today after an eleven day break. I'm sorry to see him go back. But it's been a really nice break.

Fish Killers

They were so excited to go to the lake. They wanted to take their fishing poles. Baby said, "I want to kill some fish!" LOL

Sunday pics

Exceptional Talent

I love my husband. I love to just watch him from across the room. He occasionally sees me and asks, "What?" He does things all day that say, "I love you". Like getting up to fix the kids' breakfast while I sleep a little longer. He oftten cleans up the kitchen. And he does so much more.

He has this exceptional talent that amuses me for the most part.

He's a tea drinker. I think it's cute. (I'd drink it if I added about 3 heaping tablespoons of sugar.) He fills his little tea pot, and turns on the burner. And no matter how high or low he turns the heat, it whistles when he's not in the room.

I don't mind fixing his tea. It's just that I don't always know he's not in the kitchen, and the tea pot whistle is shrill. So it whistles, and I wait a minute or two to hear if he's going to get it. And I get up, and just as I get there, he rushes into the room.

Inside out, upside down and backwards

That's how my sleep routine is right now.

Yesterday I took a nap. Everyone was sleeping, and I was falling asleep with DHs laptop on my lap. So I crawled into bed. And I slept hard, and long. Until DH started pestering me.

Every five minutes or so, he kept telling me what time it was.

"It's five to five."

"It's five."

"It's five after."

"It's eleven after five!"

I finally asked what he was talking about. "Doesn't Baby have ballet?"

"What day is it?!"

We were late.

And last night, after 2 glasses of Diet Coke at Denny's for late supper with Baby after her long practice, and a piece of chocolate, peanut butter silk pie for dessert (my splurge of the century week) I was WIDE awake until after 3:30 am. I started considering getting back up. But eventually I fell asleep.

But that has no bearing on what ungodly time in the morning the kids get up. And start playing fighting pestering their day.

So I'm up. And awake. And the morning is half gone.

My son, the military fanatic, is outside running around in camo and an army helmet with his machine guns. Baby is playing quietly inside. And I am dreaming of a nice, long nap.

But that's how this horrible cycle gets started. So I might have to push through and go to bed early tonight.

Sure.

Kids

Little Boy and Baby were getting a little wild. We asked them to settle down before she got hurt. We listed several incidents where she has ended up hurt. He said, "But that was an accident," or "That was not on purpose." Then we mentioned one incident that definitely wasn't an accident.

As he walked out the door, he said, "You got me on that one!"

At supper, Little Boy was done eating, and Daddy and I were sitting at the table talking. Baby was still finishing up. I asked her, "How'd you get so pretty?" She smiled a sweet, slightly smug smile. Then I asked her, "How'd you get so rotten?"

She pointed at me.

Daddy about fell off his chair laughing.

I told her she was pointing in the wrong direction.

Saturday

We woke up in a typical fashion lately. Daddy and Mommy semi-comatose, Baby up first and wandering around, Little Boy still sleeping until Baby opens his door and then the laughing, fighting and banging around starts. And I get up and stumble to his room and tell them to be quiet, and make it back to bed for a couple more minutes.

Baby and I had to leave the house by 9:30 to go get her pictures taken for ballet. Daddy fixed breakfast for the kids; I grabbed a breakfast bar. Last minute I started looking for hair clips. Why do I do that to myself? But it's a good thing I did; we ended up using them.

We got to the studio to find all-out pandemonium. Little girls (and big girls) running around in costumes, moms, grandmas and even babies. We figured out Baby's first costume and got her ready. And then I had to try to figure out their crazy picture packages. We left there about an hour and a half later.

We came home and I fixed lunch for the kids. I had a Reliv shake, and decided to take a nap. I guess Daddy got the kids down for their nap. I took a long nap, only interrupted a couple times by Baby before she went down.

I woke up dreaming about oven-roasted potatoes. So I got up and got them started. I fixed pork chops with rib rub, a green salad, and left over dinner rolls. We had corn, cottage cheese and green olives, too. Everything was very yummy!

I logged onto our local news site. The headlines were that a local businessman killed his wife and then killed himself. I started reading the article - it was someone I knew. My SIL worked for them for several years. I had interviewed for a job there, too, and turned down the job they offered me. DH and I had been in their home to hook up a computer. My SIL told me tonight that they had lost just about everything they owned, his car dealership was being shut down by GMAC and he had started using drugs again. The worst thing was that their 11 year old son was probably home at the time. I haven't heard, but it's possible their younger daughter was home, too. I don't understand people like that.

SIL asked if we were going to need cat food anytime soon. She works next door to the vet hospital I go to. I told her I was up there Friday. Jack got a steroid shot for irritable bowel, and I got the food then.

G & G moved to the lake house yesterday. Baby was telling them good-bye. Grandma told her she was going to miss her so much. "I'll send you a postcard every day, Grandma." So sweet - a little melodramatic - and without telling Mommy, quite impossible. :0)

Kids are getting ready for bed, I'm watching the NASCAR All-Star race, and DH is somewhere. In the den, I think. I need to look over my Sunday school lesson and figure out what to sing tomorrow for special music.

I feel better right now physically than I have in a while. It's amazing what a good nap can do for you!

My New Best Friend

I am looking forward to waking up one of these mornings without a pounding headache. Hopefully soon.

Last night I fixed spaghetti. Well, first I fixed the sauce. Little Boy came into the kitchen asking what the horrible smell was. I guess he's never been in the kitchen when I saute the onion and garlic. I had frozen sauce that I thawed and added some more tomato sauce and paste. We were browning the garlic bread; DH hit the simmer button on the stove and something POPPED quite loudly. And the stove turned off. He turned the knobs off and went downstairs. He flipped the breaker. We won't be using the simmer button anymore.

I fixed salads - I must say, I like my salads. :0) I was almost done with everything when I realized I hadn't fixed any pasta. DH said he was wondering when I was going to get it started.

We were done eating, and Little Boy had gone next door to see G & G. Baby needed some help finishing up. When I had washed her face, I asked her if she liked the spaghetti. She said, "Thank you for making that yummy spaghetti, Mommy," and she hugged me.

It's so nice to be thanked. And nothing beats her little hugs!

Life After a Cure

Day 7 in Diabetes Blog Week hosted by Bitter Sweet.

I mentioned in an earlier post that when a cure is found, I will fall on my face in complete gratitude to God. And then I'll dance a happy dance! And of course, there will be tears because I'm such a crybaby.

I can only imagine the look of utter amazement on my son's face. And disbelief. And amazement.

I'd be calling everyone I know to share the great news.

We'd have a celebration - a huge party, and he could eat as much as he wanted of whatever he wanted.

His little fingers would heal.

We wouldn't have any fussing before meals when it was time to check his bg.

I wouldn't have anxiety attacks in the grocery store.

My fears for his health would gradually subside.

No more 2 am checks.

No more middle of the night shots for highs or carbs for lows.

We would go back to how we were before his diagnosis, but we would be so aware of the blessings of "normality". And we would look back on the time of insulin shots, highs and lows, and counting carbs as a sad, scary memory. But I would hope I would feel gratitude for the treatment that bridged the gap.

Diabetes Snapshot

Day 6 in Diabetes Blog week.

I don't have pictures of Little Boy testing his blood sugar, or of him when he's been super low.

This is the day after being diagnosed. He was so scared and confused. Baby wanted to love on him, but he didn't want her near his IV ports.

And it got worse. While he was at the hospital he picked up Influenza A in the playroom.

This is Easter Sunday morning. I thank God every day for the treatment of this disease. I wouldn't miss out on this smile for the world!

Let's Get Moving

Day 5 of Diabetes Blog Week hosted by Bitter Sweet.

Little Boy is constant motion. We don't have an organized exercise program for him. He has swim lessons once a week, and other than that he is just a normal can't-be-still-for-a-minute boy. When he's helping his Granddad, he works as hard as any adult. He loves to please him. Obviously this picture isn't recent - taken in January when we were snowed in. He did a great job helping out!

To Carb or Not to Carb?

Day 4 in the Diabetes Blog Week is all about carbs.

My son is quite matter-of-fact about food. I'm thankful he's not emotional about food like I am, and I'm thankful he's not picky and stubborn about food like his little sister. Even before he was diagnosed, I had started cutting out processed foods and sugars. He's super sensitive to caffeine, so he already knew and understood about restrictions - only decaf soda and no chocolate. A year earlier, he had to have oral "surgery" - he had to have two root canals/silver caps and two small fillings under anesthesia. He can't have chewy candy or gum. So when we explained that we needed to make some more adjustments, he was fine with it.

When Little Boy was diagnosed, we met with a nutritionist, the pediatric endo and the diabetic educator. They told us what his caloric intake should be each day. And they converted that into his carb intake. He gets 45 grams of carbs at breakfast, 60 at lunch and 60 at supper. He is supposed to get a morning snack and an afternoon snack (15 cg eac), and then his bedtime snack that depends on his bg. We cut out the afternoon snack because he naps right after lunch. And last month we cut out his morning snack when he was sick. His numbers were way too high. We need to reincorporate the morning snack since his bg has been low at lunch consistently.

I guess since this is what we've been instructed to do it hasn't been a controversy for us. With his current insulin dosage and keeping strict count on his carbs, he seems to be pretty regulated. KNOCK ON WOOD. I include some "empty" carbs in his diet occasionally. He's a kid. He likes to be part of the group. But like I said, he's ok with not getting everything everyone else has. We might let him have a cheeseburger from McDs and some fries, but then I add applesauce or other fruit. He really is a sweet little guy who has adjusted better to this than I would.

My Biggest Supporter

Day 3 of Diabetes Blog Week hosted by Bitter-Sweet

My biggest supporter would definitely have to be my husband. He knows how it pains my heart to do shots. When my husband is working or sleeping (he works a swing shift) I take care of giving Little Boy his shots. I'm more than capable. I make sure I measure it out correctly, etc., and just give the shot. I can't think about any of the emotional aspects of having a Type 1 child, or I'd lose it. So if DH is home, he does them. He has literally come into the kitchen, and taken the syringe out of my hand when I was going to just go ahead and give Little Boy his shot. He knows all about measuring serving amounts, counting carbs, giving shots, what to do in case of an emergency... He is the one I lean on when I feel like I just cannot stand to see my son go through this.

He also gets up to do the 2 am check if he's home. There are nights he doesn't get near enough sleep, and he still does the check. I'm sure in large part because I am such a sound sleeper, I would probably let the alarm clock ring for a long time before waking up. But still. He does it. I often wake up as he's getting back into bed to ask what Little Boy's number is. And often I'm back asleep before he answers, and I never remember the next day. But it gives me peace that my husband has it under control.

I do have to give a huge mention to Little Boy's Diabetic Educator. Vicki is a God-send. She and Little Boy forged a close love right off the bat. He and I stop in to see her whenever we go to the hospital. She and her husband came to his birthday party last summer, and last November she went with us to see the Imagination Movers when they came to Morgantown. She has sent books to my kids, and she has been a great resource and support for me. She was the one who kept talking when I was shellshocked at his diagnosis, and she is just a really wonderful nurse. She and some others are starting a support group; I can't wait until we can go to the first meeting!

Treating Little Boy Lows

Today is Day 2 of Diabetes Blog Week being hosted by Bitter-Sweet. The theme is about treating lows. (Yesterday's theme was "A Day in the Life of..." I forgot to mention that.)

We've been dealing with this more often lately. Little Boy gets too busy outside to do a "think check". That's what we call stopping to think about how he feels. The other day he came in to eat, and he was 36! I freaked out. He was a little too out of it to notice.

I use V8 Fusion - Tropical Orange flavor - to treat his lows. I also use the same glass each time. I've gotten pretty good at pouring the right amount to treat his low.

But I really think the most important thing is that I follow the juice with a solid carb and some protein. I've read where kids are low, get juice, and soon are low again. I really feel for those kids - what a horrible rollercoaster. Most often, Little Boy is testing before a meal, so following up with with solids and proteins aren't a problem. But if it isn't meal time, the easiest thing is little Planter's nuts packages - carbs & protein in one! I might only give him half the package if it's getting close to mealtime. I buy the big box at Sam's Club. He also likes Jack Link's Beef & Cheese sticks.

Fast acting carbs + slow acting carbs + protein = happy Little Boy.

A Day in the Life of Little Boy

My first thoughts of the day are usually, It's morning already? followed by, I wonder what his number is? My jumbled thoughts try to sort themselves out, and I remember his 2 am number. Was it high, low or good? What should it be this morning?

My four year old daughter woke up at the crack of dawn today. I had to send her back to her room a couple times, "It's NOT time to get up yet!" And my head is completely stuffed up. I'd like to stay in bed all day. My husband worked a double shift - second and third. He has to get sleep so he can get up to go back out on second. So I have to get up.

Little Boy checked his blood sugar before I got up. Rare. Usually it's a small fight in the morning. Since we homeschool, we don't have the rush to get out the door for the bus or to get to school. I can't imagine the feeling of watching him walk out into the care of someone else. Right now DH and I are the only ones who really care for him. My MIL can give the shots if necessary, but she can't (or won't) figure carbs. My SIL can figure carbs, but she doesn't like the idea of the shots. So.

We have to get breakfast done, some schoolwork done, and then we're out the door. Little Boy is seeing a therapist. We're hoping she can help him deal with his feelings about being diabetic. At one time, he made the comment he'd rather be dead than diabetic. That freaked me out. And when he was upset one day, he said he should just stab himself in the neck with a knife. That did it. I had to make sure he wasn't going to really follow through. Thankfully his therapist said he isn't suicidal.

And as I think about his appointment, I'm calculating in my head. Breakfast time, snack time, lunch time. Lunch time. Will we eat out, pick up something on the way home or come home and try to fix something quickly? If we eat out, I need to take all his insulin stuff.

I'll let the kids play outside a little while when we finish lunch, and then it's nap time. I'm so thankful both of them still nap. I always worry when he's napping; Is he low? When Little Boy gets up, we'll have reading time together.

The kids will go out and play while I start fixing supper. I get tired of meal planning. It's so hard to figure out things to eat that are quick, healthy and that my picky eaters will eat. Lately, pizza and spaghetti have been favorites, but we're dealing with fast acting insulin and slowly digested carbs. He goes low, I give him juice and carbs to compensate, and he goes high later.

He and sister usually go across the yard for an hour or so after supper to spend time with their grandparents. Lately, they've been coming home with some interesting words and retelling some interesting scenes from shows they watched with Granddad. Hmm.

About 9 we start getting ready for bed. Jammies, blood check, snack, teeth, night time shot, tucking in, and then sending Baby back to bed a handful of times. I'll be up for awhile. DH will get home about 11:30 pm and we'll chat, and I'll go to bed. When he's home, he does the 2 am check. But I usually wake up when he comes back to bed to ask, What was his number? I can't remember the last time I slept soundly through the night. And even though Little Boy doesn't wake up when we check him, it must disturb his sleep too.

All through the day, when he has to check, or when he gets his shots, I pray. I pray for God's strength to care for him to the best of my ability. I pray for him to be strong. I pray for him to gain wisdom in taking care of himself as he gets older. But mostly I pray for a cure. I would fall on my face in complete and all-consuming gratitude at the news of a cure. And then I'd dance the happy dance!

Awareness

I was just reading one of the blogs I follow. This baseball mom made the cutest snacks/treats for her son's team. She made homemade Babe Ruth bars, and frosted cupcakes dipped into colored sugar with frosted, decorated baseball sugar cookies on top.

A couple years ago I wouldn't have thought anything of it. Cute! I'll bet those boys were thrilled and gobbled them up!

And then I pictured my son on that team. And the picture quickly changes from cute and exciting to challenging and frustrating.

First of all, my son can't have chocolate. Unless you want an angry, raging maniac on your team. Maybe if it was hockey...ahhhh, still "No." He is super sensitive to caffeine. He hates how he feels when he's caffeinated. LOL

But then, there's the sugar/carb-overload thing. It's not that I don't allow him to have sweets. He can have treats in moderation, and if I figure it into his mealtime carbs. But I just cannot imagine how many carbs are in that snack. We talk often about empty carbs and healthy carbs, and we talk about low and high glycemic foods. I try to not use the terms "bad" and "good", but occasionally I do use "good carbs." I tell him or show him comparisons. He knows that the sweets burn off quickly, leaving him with low blood sugar.

I cry inside when I think of kids gobbling up goodies with no cares about checking sugar or getting shots. Occasionally, Little Boy forgets, and he's so happy. And then we have to face reality, and it breaks my heart to have to remind him.

So while I wouldn't blast the blogging mommy for serving up empty carbs, I'm kinda glad she's not showing up at my son's baseball game with her cute goodies.

To my mom on Mother's Day

May God give you all that you so richly deserve on this day, and may you reap all that you have sown.

That's the most honest thing I can say to you.

Why I am a complainer.

First, I am a complainer by nature - sin nature, that is. And I was conditioned to become a complainer by my mother - a complainer. I am also a complainer by habit. It's a hard habit to break. But I am also a complainer because it is more acceptable than being a batterer or a murderer. Stupid, inept people "make" me complain.

My daughter goes to ballet lessons. I work very hard to get her there on time. Many times, I fight with her to get her dressed to get there on time. And we arrive with time to change into her ballet shoes, pee one last time if necessary, and be in the studio at 5:30. And then the class starts late. The instructors don't have their music cd's ready. Often they don't have their lesson plans finalized, and when there is more than one teen helper in the class there is a lot of visiting going on versus teaching.

I want to complain. I want to very sweetly share my frustration. But I hold it in.

My kids go to swim lessons. Baby's class usually starts on time, and runs long. Little Boy's class often starts late and ends on time. I am paying $70 for his 6 weeks of lessons. The class is only half an hour long. If she cuts off 10 minutes, he's only getting 20 minutes of lessons. And his class has two skill levels in it - swimmers and Little Boy. Ok, there's a girl who can't swim, either. And the two of them either get left behind, or the swimmers don't get as much attention. Last night, Little Boy spent a good portion of the lesson, dog paddling from one end of the pool to the other, with one arm on the ledge. I didn't pay $70 for him to do that. Before the end of class, the teacher did help him paddle in the middle of the lane. And he did jump in at the end only holding onto one of her hands.

I want to complain. I wanted to go to the desk and talk to the manager. But I didn't.

I see how others regard the care of my diabetic son, and it is clear that no one is as diligent in his care as my husband and I. I don't slip him sweets, I don't encourage empty carbs, I don't guess at his carbs, I don't let him eat what he wants and then try to guess at his insulin. I read labels, I count carbs, I weigh food, I measure food, I am pained at the grocery store when I make choices that are best for him rather than what is yummiest. I confiscate candy from my kids every Sunday and try to run interference with my in-laws.

I should complain, but I try to manipulate things instead.

I go to church, and I see how things are thrown together at the last minute. And I see how things are done conveniently, instead of professionally. And it bothers me. Down in the core. I've offered to help with things, but am not taken up on it. I've helped organize things with checklists, and people think I'm crazy. People get up to sing, and it's so clear that they didn't even run through the song. It makes me want to scream. I've been taught - hammered - that whatever I do for the Lord needs to be done with excellence.

And I want to complain. But I don't.

I wish I could be one of those happy, oblivious people who comes, warms the pew, gets a blessing and leaves. But I just can't seem to get there.

Our local McDonald's is the worst. I hate to cook on Sunday, so we pick up McDonald's on the way home. For a while I kept track of the wrong order stuff on the calendar. It has gotten better lately, but last week they messed up when my DH bought dinner for him and Little Boy. He complained online. He got a response, and two coupons for free value meals.

I'm glad I married a complainer.


Is there something wrong with me? I feel like I'm doomed to be a complainer for the rest of my time here on Earth.

I guess what it is is that I work so hard to keep things in line, running smoothly and looking professional, that when others come rushing through it's an insult.

Vocabulary

Lately, I've noticed more and more that my children have an advanced vocabulary.

Yesterday, Baby had an eye appointment with the specialist for her lazy eye. They have stuffed animals at the far end of the room that move and make noise. There is a foot switch under the front of the exam chair. When the assistant turned off the wiggling, grunting piggy, Baby wanted to know how the piggy stopped automatically.

The assistant turned and looked at me. "Automatically? That's a big word for a four year old." I laughed. "She and her brother both have advanced verbal skills."

When we were shopping, we were walking through a section that had toys intermingled with the clothes. (How's that for sneaky?) Baby looked around and said, "This store is toy-riffic!" I had her repeat what she said, and asked her if she heard that somewhere or if she made it up. She said she made it up. Pretty smart!

Later I was thinking of the night before. Little Boy was not being gentle with Baby; she turned and said, "Brother, you are such a MANIAC!"

LOL

New entrance requirements

Baby was playing with Little Boy's race track. She had taken two pieces out and couldn't figure out how to put them back in. Little Boy and I were working on his schoolwork. He leaned over and said to me out of the corner of his mouth, "I don't think she's going to make it into college."

I had to laugh out loud. This coming from the boy who constantly confuses "d" and "b" -- who knows phonics rules, but refuses to take the time to apply them to even the simplest words.

I needed a laugh.

Ladies' Banquet - Lemons to Lemonade

Lemonade. Yumm. I love it. Without the tartness of the lemons or without the sugar it wouldn't be the same.

It's the same for our troubles and trials. Without the trials, we wouldn't have to rely on God; without God's grace, care and love, we couldn't bear the trials.

I shared a bit of my testimony regarding Little Boy's diagnosis, and what we've dealt with since. I have learned two things: 1) Every day I have to depend on God's strength to get through the day. 2) I can empathize with other parents of children with health issues.

I sang the song Press On by Selah. It's a beautiful song, and I did ok.

I'm just glad I sang before I had to talk. It's hard to sing with a lump in your throat.

Blah blah blah blah blah blah

There are days that that's all I hear. I have so much on my mind, and so many projects to do and finish, and I have run out of patience. I love my husband, and I love my chidren, but when they and others talk to me, sometimes I am rudely a million miles away. I find myself hurrying the kids outside to play, and kissing DH goodbye, and taking a deep breath. And then I have to jump into working on some project. Like the slide show for my special for the Mother/Daughter banquet, my testimony for the M/D B sharing how I am making lemonade from lemons regarding Joel's diabetes, my Sunday school lesson book that I need to get done for Sunday, and then the other list of things. But then I get interrupted by appointments. And I have to shift gears again.

I know I need to be more plugged in; I just hope I don't trip on all the cords that are plugged in.

Oops

Baby got up during the night, and we found her in her room crying.

Lights on, no pullup, an inside-out and backward dress over her night shirt.

And a huge puddle. In the middle of the floor.

Apparently, she thought she was in the bathroom.

We got her cleaned up, her floor mopped up and back in bed.

Poor little thing.

Let's hope it was a one-time deal.

Eeeee-er Eeeee-er

I stopped at the store on the way home from church. And I forgot one of the most important items on the list in my head. Tomatoes! argh!

I told Baby she had to go back to the store for me tomorrow to get them.

Daddy told her she could go now; that she had to walk.

"I could just take the car."

We all laughed.

With flailing arms and scrunched up nose: "I know how to steer. Eeeeee-er Eeeeee-er."

Oh my.

Crockpot Chicken Fajitas!

Crockpot Chicken Fajitas
2 pounds individually quick-frozen chicken breast tenderloin fillets

1 1.4-ounce package fajita seasonings
2 1/2 cups (1/2 package) frozen-pepper stir-fry
Juice of 1 lime (approximately 1 1/2 tablespoons)
1/2 cup reduced-sodium chicken broth
12 fajita-sized flour tortillas
1 cup reduced-fat shredded cheddar or Monterrey Jack cheese
Fat-free sour cream, for garnish
Shredded lettuce, for garnish
Diced tomato, for garnish

Place frozen chicken tenderloin fillets in crock pot. Sprinkle fajita seasonings over top. Add pepper stir-fry, lime juice and chicken broth. Cover and cook on low for 6 to 8 hours.

Spoon some of the chicken mixture onto a tortilla, sprinkle with some of the cheese and garnish as desired with the sour cream shredded lettuce and diced tomato.

Makes 6 - 8 servings.

VERY yummy!

Checklist

1. Get showered and get presentable
2. Clean and redecorate Sunday school room
3. Stop at grocery store for a few things
4. Lunch
5. Practice music for church anniversary party tonight
6. Survive anniversary party at church tonight
7. Finish up Sunday school lesson for tomorrow

All that and try to enjoy the day.

It wasn't easy

but I did it. I sat here last night watching my Thursday night DVR'd shows without snacking.

I still have a couple shows to watch. It was getting way too late to watch them last night.

I did watch the finale on Project Runway. I am SO glad Emilio didn't win. His ego is impossible. His snotty comments to and about Tim were unacceptable. I didn't really have a favorite between the other two contestants.

Swim class went well last night. Poor Little Boy. I cringe when he balks. He is asked to float on his back, jump in and go under for a second. His little face looks pained. I keep giving him thumbs up that he can do it. I keep telling him his teacher is a life guard, and she's not going to let anything happen. "What if I go to the bottom, and I don't come back up?" I told him that would never happen.

The kids woke up this morning asking what day it is. I told them it's Friday. "What's that mean?" (They were asking if we have any activities today.) It means we don't have to go anywhere today!"

Baby says, "But I want a strawberry milkshake! I want a shake!"

Come here; I'll give you a shake. I was laughing. She was pouting.

I have no idea where the milkshake comment came from; it's been a couple months since she had one.

I should get breakfast fixed while the kids are happy and occupied.

The only thing better than Friday is Saturday. LOL

They're Baaaaaack!

I've been dreading this time of year for one reason. But to me it's a pretty big reason.

Little Boy was walking down the hall, and came running back into the living room.


"There's something on the wall. Like a toothpick."



I was afraid I knew what it was.




I was right.





I told him to stand back. Not because I was afraid it would attack him, but because I was afraid he would scare it. And it would run away, and we'd never find it.


Heebie Jeebie time.







As gross as this picture is, the one on the wall was even more gross. It was BIGGER!

Impressive

Baby and I were in the car yesterday. She was jabbering away as usual.

"Mommy, what if we see a nocturnal animal in the daytime?"

That would be something. It's possible, but not likely since they prefer....

"Night!"

That's right!

"That's impressive."

She cracks me up.

In You Alone

When I am weak, You carry every burden
When I'm alone, You're just a breath away
When I am restless, You're the One Who who stills me
And where I fail, You always stay the same

In You alone, I'm lifted up to Heaven
In You alone, I soar on borrowed wings
When I reach the end, You are just beginning
In You alone, I find all that I need

When I am lost, You rescue me from danger
And when I fall, You pick me up again
When I resist, You love past my defenses
And though I stray, You're patient to the end

In You alone, I'm lifted up to Heaven
In you alone, I soar on borrowed wings
When I reach the end, You are just beginning
In You alone, I find all that I need

In You alone, I soar on borrowed wings
When I reach the end, You are just beginning
In You alone, in You alone

This is the song by Steve Green that I sang last Sunday. I sure need to remind myself that He is there when I feel alone.

Day 1

Today I am trying to get back on track food-wise. I'm not feeling well, so maybe it won't be white knuckles all day. I need to get on the treadmill when the kids go outside to play. Hopefully the big clang sound Little Boy made by kneeling on the front part doesn't mean it's out of commission. And they will be doing something other than riding vehicles. Yesterday, I walked out on the porch just in time to see Little Boy ram his four-wheeler into the side of Baby's Mustang. She said he had done it multiple times. This is something we've talked about before, so he will not be riding for a few days now. And she doesn't like to ride if he's not.

I want to go back to bed. But two little people need me. I'm not entirely sure if I am homesick for my bed because I don't feel well, if I'm just so tired, if it's the allergy medicine, or if I'm depressed. Or it could be a combination of any/all of those reasons. Maybe I can lie down when DH comes home at lunch.

I'm letting the kids watch the rest of an episode of Franklin. And then we need to jump into today's schoolwork.

I was up a little late last night. I'm working on my Sunday school lessons for the next couple months. I'm writing my own lessons on sports. Last Sunday I had 7 kids! I bought a book on object lessons from sports, and I'm working them into the lessons. I'm putting together a little booklet for each kid.

I would like their lessons to be fun and exciting, but I want them to work on a little something at home each week. I've been encouraging them to read one verse from Proverbs a day.

I've been enjoying fresh strawberries. I've been cutting them up into Little Boy and Baby's cereal, waffles and ice cream. They are low in carbs, so I can actually give Little Boy a good-sized portion.

It looks like it's going to be a beautiful day. I have to remember that Baby has ballet tonight. And a make up lesson tomorrow night.

Can I go back to bed already?

My name is Tammy

and I am addicted to food.

My day revolves around food.

I hate that food controls me.

I hate that I have to spend so much time fixing food. But my son is a diabetic, and his life depends on me fixing his meals and snacks. I know more about food, nutrition and diets than most people, but in this case, knowledge isn't power. I'm like an alcoholic bar tender.

It is almost impossible for me to deny myself food.

If I know there is something in the house that appeals to me, I WILL eat it.

I am an emotional eater. I eat when I am happy, sad, mad, angry, and the list goes on.

I eat when I am bored.

I eat crazy things when I am feeling desperate.

I tried a food diary a couple times, and I can't even keep up with my eating for more than a day.

I HAVE to lose weight. But I don't see it happening in a way that will satisfy my impatience.

I am admitting my problem. I need to face this head-on.

This isn't the solution, but it's a step in the right direction.

Let 'er fly

Tonight my kids were racing - Mario Cart - on the Wii. We work with them on being gracious winners and gracious losers.

But in the middle of a race, it happened. Little Boy swore. A four-letter word.

WHOA.

I sent him into the kitchen to talk to his daddy. I wanted to keep Baby out of it; she hadn't heard him. But he was not quiet about sharing with Daddy what he had said. He wasn't ashamed; he didn't know it was a bad word. He had heard someone say it.

Daddy shared with him how it's hard to not say words we hear. They prayed together and asked Jesus to help him edit what he says. He's so sweet; he's going to be ok.

Baby

After ballet class, Baby and I often go to Denny's for supper. She insisted this was what she wanted to eat. And she insisted that she wanted dessert, too. She barely made a dent. She and Little Boy split what was left for breakfast the next day, and each had plenty.



She's my little shopping buddy. We found this fruit, and had to get a picture. I hope it has a thick skin; there's no way I could eat a whole one. But it smelled very good. I think I'm addicted to the smell of citrus.

I know I'm addicted to Baby.

Smile Fix

I hog the DVR and record a bazillion DVR a few shows on Thursdays. So after the kids get into bed, I watch my shows. As I was fast forwarding through the commercials (I LOVE FWD skip!) I got my fix.

My smile fix.



Topper Shutt (cool name, huh?) is the weatherman for one of the DC stations. Whenever DH and I watch that channel, and the commercial for the upcoming weather comes on, we both perk up.


We watch for it.




Waaaatch fooooor it....








Waaaaatch foooor it....






Waaaaaaatch for iiiiiit...





THERE IT IS!



You might be asking yourself, "What on earth...?"



Well, it's not just his smile. Because if you look at the pictures, he has a nice smile. He has a smile that makes you smile.


But you have to watch this little video clip to get the full effect. Take special note right at the end. I even paused it a bit so you can catch it:

The thing is, he smiles that exact same smile at the end of each weather clip. He talks about the weather, and then suddenly smiles. Sometimes he starts out with that smile. Sometimes he holds that smile for a number of seconds until the clip ends.

And it makes us smile.

Thank you, Topper!

Maybe this guy has a future in meteorology:

"I can't wait"

So today we moved the treadmill to the living room from the den. Our living room looks horrible from a design standpoint, but I know myself. I am not going to lose weight without exercising. And I won't exercise if it's not convenient. So for now the monstrosity stays.

My kids came in from playing, and were fascinated. Daddy demonstrated it for them, and they each got a chance to get on it. And then we told them it's not a toy. And I explained it's for me, and I hope to lose some weight.

My son is matter-of-fact and told me, "I can't wait to see you skinny, Mommy."

He innocently asked me if it will take me 3 or 4 days. I laughed. "It could take me months, or years, Little Boy. And what happens if I never get skinny?"

"It's ok, Mommy. We'll still love you, even if you stay fat."


Ouch.

Philly Swirl Sweet 16

I want to share a yummy treat with anyone who is interested.

Philly Swirl Sweet 16 bars are a favorite with my kids. But what is special about this treat is that it is sugar-free with only 4 grams of carbs. They have ZERO Weight Watchers points. They are also gluten-free for those who also have to watch out for that.

Both of my kids enjoy these, and I am happy to offer them something that is so yummy.

Flare

Today wasn't a good day pain-wise. I spent a good portion of the morning in bed. And all day I've been pretty miserable. I can't wait for the weather front to move out. I wrote on FB that if I hacked off every aching joint there wouldn't be much left. A nose, maybe?

I've said it before, but I need to remind myself that having arthritis reminds me every day that I need God.

And drugs.

But mostly, God.

ha ha

Beautiful day for a drive

I made it to my doctor's appointment this morning. It's amazing what you can do when you go to the right place!

And my ear/nose/throat doctor made a quick buck today. He asked how my acid reflux was doing (fine) and how my allergies are doing. I told him my 4 year old daughter has been sick and has no concept of covering when she coughs and sneezes so I could be sick or my tree allergies have started up.

He told me that as long as I am ok with controlling symptoms with the nasal sprays and or over the counter stuff, he's ok, and he'll see me in 6 months.

Done.

And I was out and on my way back home.

It really is getting pretty - flowering trees, green tree tops on the mountains, forsythia and lilacs blooming.

I walked in the door and my son was picking up a whole bag of jelly beans off the living room floor.

Don't ask.

5 Minutes for Moms Ultimate Blog Party

So, I found this party through a blog I read.

My blog is just about the every-day happenings of a Christian, stay-at-home mom. I'm also a homeschool mommy. I have two kids; my son, Little Boy, is 6 1/2. He was diagnosed last year as a Type 1 Diabetic. For those of you who don't know, his type is not hereditary. It's not the result of being overweight. It could have been brought on by a virus, but it could be something he was born with. There are Type 2 Diabetics in our family, but he is the first Type 1 in several generations.

He's so brave, and is cooperative the majority of the time when it comes to his care. I can only imagine how old it would get to poke my finger at least 5 times a day, and get shots at least 4 times a day. My day revolves around my little guy and his needs. I have to count his carb intake; the number of carbs combined with his blood glucose level are combined to figure out his insulin dosage. I also try to watch his protein and fat intake. As someone who has weight issues, you'd think this would help. Sadly, not so.

My other child, Baby, is 4 1/2 going on 15. She is the sweetest, most beautiful little sassafrass I've ever known. If I could get her sweet side to be more dominant... We'll get there. If you scroll down to previous posts to look at her pictures, poor thing got a black eye just in time for Easter. Brother whacked her in the face with a plastic baseball bat. Purple eye - purple dress. I guess she wanted to complete the ensemble.

I have the best husband in the world. I wish we had more time to spend together. He works a swing shift, so we all work around his schedule. He's also working on a degree online during all his free time. ;-) He has a 4.0 grade average; I love that he's so smart and diligent.

I'd love to have a bunch of new regular readers through this party! Welcome to what I think or say on a regular basis at the end of the day - "What a day!"

My first 3 prize choices:
US20
US28
USC13
My next choices in order:
US4
US112
USC37
USC8
USC10

Love those lips

My kids are sincerely thankful for the gifts they received at Easter; they didn't expect much. But seeing that Little Boy is diabetic, we try to replace most of the candy with other goodies. And he's very thankful for the candy he does get. He's the sweetest little guy. I pray God gives him the strength and steadfastness to continue on his journey. I would take it from him in an instant if I could.

Cold!

The last couple days have been hot. Too hot. And then a front moved in and now it's half the temp it was! My poor daffodils are shivering!

The kids had their first swim lesson last night. I was more than halfway there when I realized I had forgotten towels. We were going to be there early, so I zipped into the mall. We ran into Penney's, grabbed two towels, and ran out. We were still there 5 minutes early. I got the kids changed and we waited. Class started a bit late (but ended on time). Both kids had a great time.

Last night DH and I were watching CSI on the DVR after he got home from work. I think he was getting annoyed with me. I kept hitting pause because I was getting anxious during the suspenseful parts. But then he told me to pause it. We listened. Someone was barking coughing. I sent him back to Baby's room with her cup with ice water. I mixed some cold medicine, honey and a splash of water. It took me a little time to convince her to drink it with the short straw. (Less chance of spilling.) I sang a lullaby to her, and she laid back on her pillow and closed her eyes. She slept the rest of the night.

And back to CSI. I was annoyed with the way the episode ended. And then I watched Project Runway and Models of the Runway, and then fell into bed.

Before we fell asleep, I told DH that Saturday I want to move our armchair in front of the fireplace, and put the treadmill where the chair is. I could tell he thought it was a weird request. He asked why I wanted to wait until Saturday. I reminded him he won't really have time to do that today. He's filling in as union pres., and then tonight he has a haircut appt. I honestly think it's my only chance of losing weight, as I'm having little or no success controling what I eat. Sigh.

More Sweetness

Meds

I seriously need to get back on my depression/anxiety prescription.

I am not doing well right now. I am so thankful for the green grass and warm temperatures. I'd be a mess if I was still seeing brown out there. And it's so nice that the kids want to be outside as much as they possibly can.

If I could just curl up in a ball, and stay in bed for as long as I wanted - UNINTERRUPTED, I'd be there about 20 hours a day.

I HAVE to get the treadmill dug out. I HAVE to lose weight.

I HAVE to figure out a way to not let my emotions about my mom affect me the way they do.

I HAVE to get the hot dogs on the grill so two little people can eat on time.

sigh

PMS - gets me every month.

Wasted Trip

I had an appointment this morning to see the ENT doctor. His office called yesterday to confirm the appointment. I hate going to this appointment. Who would look forward to seeing a doctor who looks up your nose - with a scope? And did I mention that he is nice looking? So who would look forward to seeing a nice-looking doctor who is going to look up your nose? I get nervous going to any doctor, anyway.

So for the last couple days, I would remember the appointment today, and my stomach would jump into my throat. I got up, got ready, went to the appointment, drove past my exit, had to turn around and go back, and as I pulled into the parking lot...

Empty.

Apparently, he moved his office when the new hospital opened.

It was so nice of someone to tell me that when they called to confirm my appointment yesterday.

So I dug in my purse to find my cell phone. I have his number in my planner. No phone. I left it in the other vehicle yesterday.

I drove home - furious - at them and at me - and called when I got home.

"No one informed you?"

Ahhh. That's what I just said. And I wouldn't have driven to the wrong place if they had!

So now I have a new appointment next Monday to look forward to.

I need a nap.

Easter Sweetness